I think we can all agree that Brother Bill is a highly under-utilized contributor to this blog. He is the most unintentionally funny member of the family. For those who don’t know Bill, he is the oldest of Mama Alice’s children. Bill is blind and has aspergers, relevant or not he is also the biggest ham in the family, which is saying something for people who know me. I feel like the Brother Bill franchise has tons of potential. I encourage you to suggest ways in which to exploit (ahem) I mean leverage his comedic timing to fulfill his dream of being a famous person. For consistency’s sake, my patient saint of my Mom taught Billy to type and how to write.
Without further ado, I give you a short story by William. I will read him any and all of your comments, which he will surely love.
It is a warm September afternoon I am sitting on the porch enjoying the sun on my face. Even though the sun is hot I don’t give a care because summer only comes once a year. I put my headphones on my ears. The Red Sox are on the radio. Suddenly I felt something on my leg. There was a bumblebee on me.
“Hi,” I said to the bumblebee, “My name is Bill. What is your name?”
“My name is worker,” the bumble said.
I asked the bumblebee where he was from.
“I am in the nest above your window.”
“I never heard you there and I’ve never seen you before.”
I asked the bumblebee where he was going for the winter. He said that he was trying to build a nest my house.
“In my house? I asked.
“Yes in your house.”
He sat on me for a little while and then left to go to his nest. After he left I did some thinking about this winter and those poor bees in the cold. I thought I would make a nest for my friend the bumblebee. I got some grass and some sticks and made a nest for worker and his friends. I put some glue on it so it would hold together. I had never made a nest before.
After I did that I went out in the backyard and I called for worker the bumblebee. Worker came up to me and said, “Yes can I help you?”
I told him about the nest I made for him. “You will be staying with me.”
“Thank you,” said worker, “I appreciate you as a good friend.”
Worker went to tell his friends about their new home. “Come! Come into my friend Bill’s room where you will be warm and comfy. We can have as much food as we want. Worker and all his friends came to my house. Throughout the winter and the bad snows they were nice and warm.
Epilogue. Always be kind to every living being because if you do it they will be nice to you. Try it some day. Then everyone will love you very much. Always make friends with nature.